Grant Kirkhope Grants Kirk Hope
by Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus
Summary: A special birthday fanfiction for the great Grant Kirkhope.


**Grant Kirkhope Grants Kirk Hope  
**

**By Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus**

_Happy Birthday, Grant Kirkhope!_

It was a nice quiet night at the Super Smash Brothers Mansion in the Jungle Japes on Donkey Kong Island, because the Smashers always needed to be in this ridiculous mansion, with Donkey Kong munching on a couple of ripe yellow bananas in the living room as he sighed, being quite boring.

"It's boring around here..." Donkey Kong admitted as he stretched his arms. "No one wants to talk about me..."

"Well that's because you're not a cute human, or a cute anthropomorphic animal." Falco Lombardi stated as he walked by, munching on a loaf of bread.

Donkey Kong sighed as he wrapped his arms around the back, shaking his head as he sighed to himself.

"You know, there's something about the tuba and trumpet playing together with some percussion that makes me feel so innocent," Nana admitted as she was walking with Popo, who was holding a portrait of Kirk Thorton.

"Yeah. I can definitely see why you would think that." Popo responded as he rubbed the portrait of Kirk Thorton.

Nana eyed Popo as she shook her head, with the female Wii Fit Trainer running up to the two Ice Climbers as she looked at Popo oddly, then turning to Nana.

"Why is your brother holding a picture of Kirk Thorton?" Wii Fit Trainer asked as she had her hands on her hips.

Nana rolled her eyes as she turned to the Wii Fit Trainer. "Because he wants to _grant Kirk hope_."

Popo squealed in response as he lifted his right foot, tilting his head back as he closed his eyes, blushing as he was thinking about Grant Kirkhope.

"...Oh." Wii Fit Trainer commented, taking a back to think after hearing Popo gush, folding her arms together as she nodded. "Oh... I see what you meant now..."

It was then that the mansion suddenly collapsed, with Crazy Hand chuckling nervously as he held a conductor baton.

"Ehehehe... sorry about that." Crazy Hand sheepishly admitted as he felt embarrassed. "I was trying to get my Elfman on..."

"I'm right here, you know..." Link grumbled as he poked his head through the rubble, with Crazy Hand chucking the conductor baton at him, knocking the Hyrulian out as Crazy Hand left to get some burgers.

* * *

The next day, after the Smash Mansion was fixed up in the morning, Donkey Kong was in the same spot as he was before, this time hearing a weird, quirky oompah beat in the background as he glanced around the living room.

"What the... is Princess Peach farting again?" Donkey Kong remarked as he scratched his head, heading towards the front door as he noticed the beat was getting louder, opening it and receiving a punch to the face by a male Mii.

"Oh fucking christ. You haven't got a chance." The Mii responded as he pointed at Donkey Kong.

Donkey Kong groaned as he shook his head, squinting his eyes at the Mii as he pointed at him. "Hey... you voiced me in DK64! Aren't... aren't you Grant Kirkhope?"

"Heh... guilty as charged." The Grant Kirkhope Mii responded as he shrugged. "Although I'm just a Mii of him."

A high pitched, girlish squeal was heard as the blue male Ice Climber, Popo, pushed Donkey Kong to the side, clapping his hands together as he was bouncing in glee as he was anxious.

"Ooh Grant, I love your music!" Popo remarked as he then hugged Grant Kirkhope, letting out tears of joy. "It makes me feel alive and full of energy! I didn't know you were coming to the mansion!"

Grant Kirkhope simply chuckled in response as he patted Popo on the head with his right hand. "Heh, like I just told you, I'm just a Mii of him."

"Mii smii, I still love ya, you ginger bastard!" Popo remarked as his hug got tighter on Grant Kirkhope, who sunk away as he walked into the mansion.

Master Hand was checking a list of groceries as he noticed Grant Kirkhope, waving at him. "Oh hey there, Grant. Came for a visit to this overused mansion?"

"Well, yes. I just wanted to see what was all the hubbub about this place." Grant remarked as he pulled out a picture of Captain Kirk from Star Trek. "And I wanted to see if I could do some remix of certain tunes."

Silver The Hedgehog and Pit walked by as they noticed Grant Kirkhope, the two characters looking at each other as they blinked.

"How come he has a picture of William Shatner?" Pit asked as he rubbed the back of his head with his right hand.

Silver smirked as he whispered to Pit, "Because every night before bed, he likes to _grant Kirk hope_."

"...Oh!" Pit exclaimed as he began laughing, making weird chortling noises as he stopped upon noticing everyone looking at him oddly. "Uh... sorry. Couldn't help myself."

"Ha. You think you're dropping your _nuts and bolts_, angel boy, take a _rare_ look at the fanboy over here," Donkey Kong remarked as he held Popo in his right hand, the Ice Climber's smile wide and his teeth brightly shinning as he held his hands together, his entire body shaking from anticipation.

"Grant Kirkhope is in the Smash Mansion right now... ooh, I'm so excited I could pee!" Popo admitted, which caused him to get trapped inside a DK Barrel that Donkey Kong pulled out of nowhere. "Ooh, me knackers!"

Awkward silence as Grant Kirkhope coughed, folding his arms together.

"...So, where's the music room?" Grant Kirkhope stated as he pulled out a black guitar out of thin air. "I could give you a nice guitar solo, or just go with the quirky oompah style."

"...Like oompah loompas?" Pit asked as she tilted his head to the right.

Silver sighed as he shook his head, facepalming. "No, Pit. Not that oompah."

"He means this, you simpleton!" Wario stated as he appeared in front of everyone in his biker gear, beginning to go 'wah' as Princess Peach Toadstool farted her way into the living room with a Peach Bomber.

"Oh, are you doing the Danny Elfman like music?" Peach stated as she began releasing bassy, deep pitched tuba like farts in conjunction with Wario's 'wahs', with Sonic The Hedgehog zipping in and doing beats with his mouth.

"Man, this style is tight!" Sonic stated in between beats as he was doing various poses as well.

Grant simply blinked as he turned to Master Hand, pointing at the 'wahing' Wario, the farting Princess Peach, and beat boxing Sonic. "Do they... do they always act like this?"

"Believe me, more than you know." Master Hand stated as he simply moved his fingertips about, leaving Grant with the music making Smashers as he left through the first door.

Popo busted out of the DK Barrel with his mallet, rushing up to Grant and hugging him again as he kept squealing.

"Dang it, Grant, I love you so much..." Popo squealed in joy as red hearts surrounded his head. "I have an entire shrine dedicated to you and your great music..."

Grant tried to push Popo away, but noticed the Ice Climber coming right back as he sighed, looking at DK. "So... how's the DK Crew doing?"

"Diddy? He's fine. Gotten a lot more annoying when he came here, though." Donkey Kong reported as he folded his burly arms. "Don't know what happened to the others, though."

Grant sighed as he nodded. "So I see." He then approached Wario, Sonic, and Peach, moving his hands around as Popo still clinging to him. "You think you guys got the oompah beat down? Wait until you wankers see a real master at work..."

And then Grant Kirkhope pulled out a synthesizer and began performing some Banjo-Kazooie music, with the music being so good it caused the entire mansion to collapse. Grant popped out of the rubble as he looked around, slightly blushing.

"Heh... whoops, I didn't meant to do that." Grant remarked as he rubbed the back of his head. "I guess I had a bit too much style for them..."

"But I still enjoyed it!" Popo admitted as he held his hands together with red hearts in his eyes, proceeding to chase Grant Kirkhope all over the Jungle Japes as the various jungle life watched and laughed.


End file.
